Thursday, April 23, 2009

Limbaugh: “Waterboarding Just Like Kiteboarding with Richard Branson!”

In his ongoing effort to defend the Bush administration’s “enhanced interrogation” methods, Rush Limbaugh on his radio show today, compared techniques involving nudity and stress positions, as well as being repeatedly doused with water while clinging to safety from a forced supine position, to recent photos of Sir Richard Branson kiteboarding near his private island.

“How are the so-called torture pictures at Abu Ghraib all that different from what this supermodel is happily doing during her little island vacation with Richard Branson?” Limbaugh railed.

“These liberals,” he said, “are soooo outraged about what they call ‘torture’ that they forget the fact that a slap or two on a choice part of the body is just what many people desperately crave.” At which point, he demonstrated by slapping himself several times (in an unidentified, but loudly resonating and likely jiggling, location) and crying out “There, I’m torturing myself!”* - presumably while ogling the Branson pictures and reminiscing about his Viagra-fueled Dominican adventure spent with the fellow torture buffs who happen to produce Fox Television’s 24*.

*True

3 comments:

  1. I totally love it, you name it whatever, it remains something which I can't live without.

    Robert

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  2. Anonymous6:34 PM

    fair enough :)! HOWEVER- If Obama is ever photographed KiteBoarding I'm done with it :(

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  3. how anal u gotta be to compare an exiting sport with torture techniques. I kinda wanna slap Limbaugh in the face right now and im getting a vibe he might like it. Poor man just craves attention.

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